Causeway walk

I work in Singapore, every weekend I go back to my home in Johor Bahru, Malaysia.

Most of the Fridays, I have to walk across the Causeway(for those who don't know, this is the bridge connecting Singapore and Malaysia, approximately 1km long) to reach Malaysia checkpoint due to the damn heavy jam. Sometimes I can see the Causeway is not jammed, but the traffic before Singapore checkpoint is darn heavy..thus, it's foreseeable no bus in coming anytime soon. And so, I still gotta walk across the Causeway.

Last Friday I took photos of Singapore checkpoint and Malaysia scenery while I was on the Causeway. I tried to hold my camera as still as possible and put my hands on the rail but my hands were no tripod. So the pictures are blur...

Singapore Checkpoint

The Singapore Checkpoint building is a bit like a fortress. When the reflection is cast in the calm water on a clear day(especially in the evenings), it can create interesting composition photos. Shame my hands were not steady enough to take a clear photo of it.

Malaysia Scenery

My brother said this looks just like Shanghai...

Professor Lupin

Visited a website last week, where Harry Potter's fans can put up questions for others to answer. There was a question about who's your favourite and least favourite character and who would you have a crush for.

My answer was, I like all Harry, Ron and Hermione, and Dumbledore AND not forgetting, Dobby the house-elf! Well, actually I also like Sirius and Professor Lupin. My least favourite character was, undoubtedly, that Umbridge woman. And I wrote, I would love to have a date with Lupin.

And guess what? Yesterday, I dreamt that I was lying in Professor Lupin's arms! Wohoa!!....... Sweet dream, sweet dream, indeed. Hahahahahah... made me really happy. I was having a bad night sleep actually, couldn't sleep till about 3am... But this dream, this dream saved it all! Ha!

GO TO HELL!!!

I was molested yesterday! Bastard!!

I was at the ATM machines (Jurong MRT station) queuing, as usual, I left a gap between the person withdrawing money and myself. Then came a guy, 30-40yrs old, he walked through this gap between us, it wasn't a small gap, and that BASTARD, FOUL, EVIL, SON-OF-A-BITCH used his god damn elbow to brush against my breast!! AAARRRGGHGHHHH!!!!

I was so shocked that he dared to do that in broad day light! I was talking on the phone and was so shocked, I only managed to yell "BABI!!" (PIG) at him! FUCK!!!!!! I should have kicked him, that's the least that I can do, I SHOULD HAVE KICKED HIM IN THE GROIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God I was so angry !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've always guard myself and imagine what I'd have to do if someone touches my butt from behind, but never have I thought about someone walks pass in front of me and uses his elbow to brush against my breast! BASTARD BASTARD BASTARD!!!

I was sooooo ssssssttttttttuuppiiiidddd!!!! I should have grabbed him and at least kicked him!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

BASTARD!!! The more I think about it, the angrier I am, but there's nothing I can do now...

I CURSE HIM! BASTARD PERVERT, BABI! I CURSE HIM GO TO HELL! YES! GO TO HELL! OR LET HIM FALL ON A FIRE ANTS' MOUNT AND LET THE ANTS BITE EVERYWHERE ON THIS SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!
BETTER STILL, LET THE ANTS BITE OFF HIS DISGUSTING PENIS!!!!! BITE TILL NOTHING IS LEFT!!!!

Friends

Who, apart from our family of the same blood, are the most important people in our lives? Husband? Friends?

I noticed, most Asians, once married, tend to drift away from their friends, including bestfriends. I've looked around my married friends, I've asked them whether they still have bestfriends, and the answer are usually negative.

Friends, were most important to us when we're studying. We confided everything to our bestfriends. This changed a bit when we reached secondary school, when people started to have boyfriends or girlfriends. They no longer hang out with their bestfriends during breaks like they used to. It happens to everyone, I'm sure. That's only normal, I should say.

Then after we left school, friends are still important. Bestfriends talked about their bfrens/gfrens, went shopping together, complaint about our bosses, etc.. etc... and most important of all, bestfriends are the shelter we would go to when we had a quarrel with our bfren or gfren.

Once married however, things changed dramatically. I have not married, perhaps that is why it's beyond my comprehension. Husband is no doubt important, but what about friends who had gone through everything with you? It needs effort to maintain a marriage and so does friendship. Does being married means you don't have time for friends anymore?

I had a bestfriend in primary school. I thought we will remain bestfriends forever, but that was no doubt a very naive thinking. She had to move to Singapore because of some family matters. I was so sad that she had to go. We remained in contact via letters for a good few years. Our letters often reach at least 5pages in chinese.

The day had came inevitably after a few years when we stopped writing to each other. On one particular day several years after that, I received a letter from her again. She talked about her boyfriend. She was upset because she had quarrelled with her boyfriend. I was happy to have received her letter again and I replied.

The following letters, she talked about NOTHING but HER BOYFRIEND. I was hurt. Is that all she can say after we've didn't contact for so many years? It felt like she didn't want to get back in contact with me, it wasn't that she missed this once-bestfriend-person. She just needed a channel to released her tension that's been going on between she and her boyfriend. She merely needed a "listening ear". I will be more than happy to listen to her had we were still in contact before she "poured" all her problems with her boyfriend on me. It didn't matter to her actually, who was the person who's reading the letter. She merely needed to "let it out"... and I stopped replying.

As I said, friendship needs to be maintained, just like marriage. You don't call or look up a long-time-no-see-friend and tell her all your problems. Who would like that? What are we? A problem-solving-counsellor who can come and go as you need?

Someone with more experience in life (in another word, "older") told me, friends come and go. They do not stay with you forever, however close you once were. That is really true... For a typical Aries like myself, this is a real cruel fact in life to accept. Friendship is important to me. I like to share their happiness, sadness as much as I like to make them laugh. But... friends really do come and go in your life. I'll just have to accept plainly whatever it is that's been arranged on my path ahead in life, I guess.

Oops...

Went Giant with a friend yesterday. The queue was so damn long… So we looked for the express counter which is on the far right side.

So we joined the queue, and I noticed a lot of people in the 2 lines of queue definitely had more than 10 items (express counter limit). So I said to my friend in a very loud tone “This is suppose to be the EXPRESS counter!”.

I said it twice. Many people turned around to look at me. I put on a defiant look on my face. Nobody else said anything.

Minutes later, I notice the signboard “<- For Express Counter please use lane 21,22,23”.
The lane we were queuing was not one of lane 21,22,23…

Apparently the Express Counters had been changed to the far left side…… So I had wrongfully scolded people… ohhh hohohoho….

Luckily no one contradicted me… What a close shave…

That is why I do not like argument or point out if I think somebody is wrong.. because I always make such blunders…

Fallen...

I’ve fallen… deeper and deeper… into a pitch black world where nothing is beautiful, nothing is ugly, for whatever it is, I cannot see.

People are around, I do not feel them. It became a world of my own. A world of darkness, I do not fancy, it is my fear.

Struggling to get out.

I cannot get out by my own. I must feel again, for help is around, waiting to be reached.

Yet, how do I feel again, I asked myself? How? To feel again, I need a purpose.
There, embarked aimlessly… in search of a purpose.

I’m fighting a losing battle.

Darkness invades, threatens to suffocate me. I hear voices, fading away.

I cannot be drowned. The bare strengths within hangs on. The bare strengths from remnants of love and happiness.

Empty my mind, see no darkness… I am still holding on. But escape is not easy…

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What is this nonsense I've wrote? I have no idea. Just how I felt. The words just came to me and I just entered it...

What day is it?

Some days I love everybody, some days I hate the whole world. My mood should be categorized into “hate-the-world-day” and “everybody-is-lovely-day”.

Yesterday night was a hate-the-world-day. It felt like everyone in this world has offended me one way or another. In fact, this is my most common mood in recent years.

The only way to be happy, the “happy-proof” method, is to be ignorant. Empty our mind. Think nothing. I guess that’s what monks or Reverends do most of the time apart from studying Buddhism.

Speaking about that, if I stay in a temple all the time like the monks, it’ll be easy to tell people, “empty our mind”, “be happy”, “control your temper”, “be nice to people”, etc etc… Because I doubt you will meet nasty people in the temple. SO if everybody is nice to everybody, there’s no need to be hostile.

Try to be nice on the road where so many reckless drivers exist, try to be nice on the train where there are so many annoying people blocking the exit, try to be nice where there are so many people who cannot spell “queue”, try to be nice when people are simply rude beyond reasons, blahblahblah, I just can’t be nice… “#$*&#(*$&^&%#” will be coming out of my mouth before you realized it, especially on a hate-the-world-day.

What day is it today?

It is hate-the-world-day so far.

My stubborn chinchilla

This is my stubborn chinchilla Miko, she’s as stubborn as me.

A photo when she’s a baby. Notice her “hand” was holding on to the syringe. I just love it every time her small hand grabs my finger. It feels so much like a human baby’s grab but minute version. Wonderful feeling.




Miko wants to get out of the cage all the time. Seeing her “innocent” look like this, how can I stand not letting her out? Indeed, she’s out of the cage most of the time unless I have things to do that cannot allow her disturbance. It’s for her own good also, I can easily step on her accidentally since she zooms around like a F1 racing car…


Miko standing with her hand on the container which I keep her hay. Miko reminds me of Jackie Chan all the time cos she’s an excellent acrobat. While on a chair, she will jump onto the wall before she turns and touch down on the floor. She can jump and make a 180degree turn in mid air and zooms away.


She is also a weirdo like me. See how she sleeps. She bit the board into a U-shape hole and from then on she likes to stick herself like this and sleeps. The first time I saw this I thought she got stuck…




She’s about 7 months old. A chinchilla can live up to 15 years. I dare not grab her anyhow I like cos she will bite me… She’s a spoilt brat. I just let her come to me whenever she likes and caress her. When she’s out of the cage, she will hide under the cabinet and sleep for a while. While she’s there I do my stuff, watching tv, reading.. Minutes later she will come out and stop near me and look at me. Then I will play with her, till she’s tired and go under to cabinet to rest again. She’s very naughty but adorable.

A profile of her.

dumbledoreisnotdead.com

Guess what? Everybody thinks Dumbledore is not dead after all!!

Take a look here http://dumbledoreisnotdead.com. With so many reasonable clues (though said there “weak clues”), I really think Dumbledore will come back in the next book. :D Hooray hooray! But it’s gonna be a longgg time before the final book is out.. but I’ll keep on waiting and hoping :D

Pranks

Why do people like to play pranks on people? What’s so funny or enjoyable about that? I think the last time I made fun of people was in Primary 3, my favourite teacher being the unfortunate victim, on April Fool’s day.

I never like those “Just For Laugh” or “Candid Camera” type of show. Personally I think it’s disgusting to make fun of people…dupe innocent people into thinking they’ve done something terribly wrong, watch their terrified face on tv and laugh till you dropped.. Disgusting. Imagine you are the victim…

There is this radio station, in the morning show, the 2 DJs will call someone, the victim, trying to wake him or her up. They will call several times, ask questions like what time is it, or pretend to be someone else, blah blah blah, till the victim got fed up then they tell him or her it’s their friend who request the DJs to wake him or her up. One victim got really fed up on the 4th time the DJs called and yelled “Fucklah!”… It turned out that this person was actually on leave, and this friend of him and the DJs had spoilt his nice cozy sleep. It wasn’t funny, not funny at all.

There’s a bit of a Hermione Granger in me, I guess. I think it’s so childish to play pranks on people. I never agree with actions like pulling people’s chair away when they’re about to sit, hiding away people’s stuff, so and so. My colleague once wanted me to play along when they hide another colleague’s stuff. I told her, you want to hide it, don’t let me see it. If not I will tell. I simply cannot stand not telling the victim where his stuff is.

Harry Potter

I read Harry Potter 6 from 2pm yesterday till 3am this morning... 13 hrs... stopping only to shower and eat and pee. Never have I finished a thick book like that in one day. Never have I so enthralled in any story like that.

However, every time I finished reading a Harry Potter story it made me depressed. With each consequent story getting worse... Harry Potter 5 was already bad, with Sirius Black gone, the one person whom Harry really liked and whom was Harry's godfather. And now Harry Potter 6... with Dumbledore gone to be one of the portrait in the headmaster's room... Dumbledore died.. I have guessed this would be it. And I am right.

I was so tired at 3am having finished the whole book. But I couldn't sleep, depressed.. Dumbledore's dead. Harry Potter's story affects me greatly. I wonder why. It's fiction for God's sake... but still...

I cannot fathom J.K.Rowling's mind... Why would she wants Dumbledore dead? It's bad enough she put Sirius Black to death... I feel this, somehow, is too much to take for a children's story. I'm an adult, I didn't take it well... what about the kids? I wonder how the kids feel after they've read the book.

I wish Dumbledore didn't have to die... It's really sad...

Note: At the point of writing this post, there were not many who knew about my blog. And those who know, I know that they don't read Harry Potter. So I didn't put any "contains spoiler" warning on the top of this post...

I have caused someone to unwillingly "find out" Dumbledore will die in the book...
I should not have written this post... I apologise to those who read this post BEFORE they finish reading Harry Potter... Sincerely apologise... I'm sorry...

Madagascar

I want to go to Madagascar. Not because of the recent animation "Madagascar" of course...
It's a place I've always dream of going, and Africa and Galapagos.

I want to see animals in their own habitats. I want to see lemurs in Madagascar, although I can see them in Singapore Zoo... but that's not the same of course.

I don't want to have holidays in China, or Taiwan or Australia, etc...(of course I would if money is not a factor lah... BUT now money is a BIG factor) I want to save my money to have a trip to either Madagascar, Africa or Galapagos. Madagascar should be the cheapest out of the 3... so hopefully one day I will able to go Madagascar first. I wonder when can I achieve this dream...