Hurtful

I am crying again, for no reason.

What? Who am I kidding? Of cos there is a reason.

Perhaps, I am trying, slowly, to distance myself emotionally from him. Slowly, there has not been as much things to talk to him like we did before. It hit me abruptly to realise this. It is not because of time, people will say "you're bored with him already". No. That's not correct. I had been deliberately, slowly, slowly trying to convince myself that he's not that wonderful, he is not that perfect. But that's hurtful. Not to him. But to myself because...

That's an insult to our past.

But what can I do..

Only if I can convince myself that there is someone better out there, can I have a chance of starting new.

But that's hurtful.

I thought I can live like this. But it seems like I can't... but I am afraid of what is going to happen, I am afraid of the future which my friends hope will happen to me.

What do I do..