I hate living

I hate this Chinese New Year. This is the worst new year I’ve ever had. Or is it? Or it has been the same degree of “worst” for the past few years?

I am unhappy. I am extremely unhappy. I hope I have the courage to die. But I am a God damn coward who dares only to write about death.

What meaning is there to live when I only melancholy everyday? What meaning is there when I cannot be happy?

Would I really have the courage to die? Would I? Would I not? Would I?.......


I thought I’ve passed through that phase. Turned out that I have not.